Fact : Is it whisky or whiskey? It’s both. The difference in the spelling depends on the style or country of origin. Whisky is generally used in Scotland, Wales, Canada and

The last time I drank whisky, I started returning things I never stole.

How did you return from the whisky tasting at the pub yesterday ?
As lightning !
That fast ?
Nope – more or less like the shape – in ziq-zag !

AWA :
A: What is the fastest way to get stoned ?
B: Whisky on the rocks.

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 9th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

“Now, class. Observe closely the worms,” said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.
The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
“Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?” the professor asked.

Scott, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, “Drink whiskey and you won’t get worms.”

From the movie “A beautiful Mind”
(Big time hangover)
Officer i know the driver of the car that hit me.
His name is Johnnie Walker.

Parrot Takes Flight
On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him.
He asks the stewardess for a coffee whereupon the parrot squawks, “And get me a whisky, you cow!”

The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.
When this omission is pointed out to her, the parrot drains its glass and bawls “And get me another whisky you bitch!”

Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.
Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot’s approach. “I’ve asked you twice for a coffee! Go and get it now or I’ll kick your ass!”

The next moment both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards.

Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says, “For someone who can’t fly, you’re a ballsy bastard!”

Pocket A guy walks into a bar and orders a shot of whisky. He gulps it down and peeks into his shirt pocket.
He then orders another shot of whisky, gulps it down and peeks into his short pocket.
He orders a third shot and does the same thing. After the sixth shot, he asks the bartender for the bill, pays and starts to walk out.
Curiosity gets the better of the bartender and he says to the guy :
“Excuse me, but I noticed that every time you drank a shot, you kept looking into your pocket. I was wondering what’s in your pocket.
” The guy slurs, “Well, I have a picture of my wife in my pocket. I keep drinking until she starts to look good.”

Canadian liquor manufacturers have accepted the Health Canada’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:

Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your whisky.