I would date you, but my heart already belongs to Jack Daniels.

Dear Alcohol, we had a deal, you were going to make me funnier, sexier, more intelligent and a better dancer. I saw the video, we need to talk

I drink to make other people interesting. – George Jean Nathan

I have made an important discovery… that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. – Oscar Wilde

Alcohol removes inhibitions – like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: “Now bring on that damn cat!” – Eleanor Early

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? – Stephen Wright

Beer is the reason I get out of bed every afternoon.

The best place to drink beer is at home. Or on a river bank, if the fish don’t bother you.

My boss didn’t know I am an alcoholic, till one day i came to work… sober.

Why I drink? To forget that I drink!