It’s better to be a worldwide alcoholic, than an Alcoholic Anonymous.

After the weekend the most difficult task is to remember names…

Tequila is a good drink: you drink it and you feel like a cactus; the only problem is that in the morning the thorns grow inward.

All the problems fade before a hangover…

If only I knew that I will have this headache today, I would have got drunk yesterday.

Alcohol not only helps to make new acquaintances, but also end the old once.

Alcohol not only expands the blood vessels but also communications.

Don’t forget that alcohol helps to remove the stress, the bra, the panties and many other problems.

Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.